Levinson Decius
Eng. 100
Formal Assignment #2
Due date: 2/24/19
Heart broken to a broken heart
There I am, sitting there thinking out about a past I want to forget. Low and behold the past wants to creep up on me like a monster is under my bed, and I’m
that child laying there quiet and scared of the situation that I had put myself in. as I get up walk through the door I remember seeing her face, so elegant, beautiful
in every way but as I keep walking I find myself running wild in my mind know that the person that love doesn’t love me back, my feet are hurting bad and I start to get tired from all this walking so I stop and pause, I started thinking to myself close my heart so I wont get hurt anymore and in doing so I hurt someone else in the process. Someone who didn’t deserve being hurt in the first place, they let love guide them as I did before I closed mines.
It was the school year of 2013-14 and I’m at the age where kids like to experiment in a sense, tryna figure out who they are as a person and what they are interested in, for me it’s trying to figure out how females think. I was tryna chase a relationship, but anyway while in pursuit I had met a girl by the name of Martha. A beautiful young girl who in my opinion was the prettiest girl in my 8th grade English class, and at that school built like a prison, that one class was the only chance I had getting her, so I was a man on a mission, step 1 get the girl, step 2 pass the class that I was in. As you can see my thought process wasn’t there all the way but everyday I tried inch my way to the relationship that I wanted, writing music about her and giving her advice, you know the little things but sooner then later those little things wasn’t enough. only because one of my friends had ruined it by telling her that I liked her, in my head I’m thinking my guy really mess my situation up, but it was cool though cause after found out it was all or nothing. So like a day before my middle school move up ceremony I decided to shoot my shot and I decided to tell her about everything and leaving off with a text saying,”I’ll leave with this for the night....I'm a good man the one that would and will (if possible) treat u right...I'm not like all the other ones so as for right now I'ma pop that question and let u think about it...........Now its ok to say no because that means our friendship is going to get stronger and if u do say yes,😁😁😁🌹u will feel happy for as long as we are together”. I guess that my shot was broke cause after that cause she said “Omg so sweet 😃😃😃 but I have a boyfriend 😁😁😁”, and those exact words hit me hard, I had lost the game cause I miss the shot that was supposed to be clutch. after that my whole viewpoint change, that moment taught me something crazy at young age was to never leave yourself open, to never love too early, and that mindset I was put in slump, an old athlete who’s tryna live there past when they were good.
I lost two things that day, the man in the mirror and my perception of love. Months move on and I felt like I was at least happy enough to try again so I ask on of friends to throw me the oop, and in doing so I met this other girl named Ayana she was younger then me but by like a year, she was a very talented individual, her voice is something out of this world in my eyes. I haven’t met her in person but I’ve seen her and she seen me through photos so at least we wasn’t cat fishing each other but things went well, we was on the phone like every day talking about how our days were, you know things people usually do to get to know each other, and at that moment I really felt like I kinda found what was chasing since eighth grade even though my heart was under construction but the little man on shoulder came in from work one night, and said “bro who are you texting” and I say “a girl was talking to for awhile now”, the little man asked “what she does she look like” and I show him a photo of her and the first thing he says is drop her asap, Im looking at him crazy saying “I don’t just drop people, I'm not like those other people who do”, and as the night kept going on i fell to temptation but i wasn't going to send the text, so he took my phone and sent it anyway “saying I’m sorry I can’t date you, your to young for me”.
That was another shot to the chest but it was a double edged sword, it as two people pulling the trigger that day, me shooting her perception of love and and the old me shooting me for the realization that i lost something that i could’ve had, in other words my should of, would of, could of. Now as I sit there on my bed with the song good ones playing on repeat “But the good ones go, The good ones go, if you wait too long , But the good ones go, The good ones go, if you wait too long,So you should go, You should go, before you stay too long”. An in that moment i realize a something way to special.
Eng. 100
Formal Assignment #2
Due date: 2/24/19
Heart broken to a broken heart
There I am, sitting there thinking out about a past I want to forget. Low and behold the past wants to creep up on me like a monster is under my bed, and I’m
that child laying there quiet and scared of the situation that I had put myself in. as I get up walk through the door I remember seeing her face, so elegant, beautiful
in every way but as I keep walking I find myself running wild in my mind know that the person that love doesn’t love me back, my feet are hurting bad and I start to get tired from all this walking so I stop and pause, I started thinking to myself close my heart so I wont get hurt anymore and in doing so I hurt someone else in the process. Someone who didn’t deserve being hurt in the first place, they let love guide them as I did before I closed mines.
It was the school year of 2013-14 and I’m at the age where kids like to experiment in a sense, tryna figure out who they are as a person and what they are interested in, for me it’s trying to figure out how females think. I was tryna chase a relationship, but anyway while in pursuit I had met a girl by the name of Martha. A beautiful young girl who in my opinion was the prettiest girl in my 8th grade English class, and at that school built like a prison, that one class was the only chance I had getting her, so I was a man on a mission, step 1 get the girl, step 2 pass the class that I was in. As you can see my thought process wasn’t there all the way but everyday I tried inch my way to the relationship that I wanted, writing music about her and giving her advice, you know the little things but sooner then later those little things wasn’t enough. only because one of my friends had ruined it by telling her that I liked her, in my head I’m thinking my guy really mess my situation up, but it was cool though cause after found out it was all or nothing. So like a day before my middle school move up ceremony I decided to shoot my shot and I decided to tell her about everything and leaving off with a text saying,”I’ll leave with this for the night....I'm a good man the one that would and will (if possible) treat u right...I'm not like all the other ones so as for right now I'ma pop that question and let u think about it...........Now its ok to say no because that means our friendship is going to get stronger and if u do say yes,😁😁😁🌹u will feel happy for as long as we are together”. I guess that my shot was broke cause after that cause she said “Omg so sweet 😃😃😃 but I have a boyfriend 😁😁😁”, and those exact words hit me hard, I had lost the game cause I miss the shot that was supposed to be clutch. after that my whole viewpoint change, that moment taught me something crazy at young age was to never leave yourself open, to never love too early, and that mindset I was put in slump, an old athlete who’s tryna live there past when they were good.
I lost two things that day, the man in the mirror and my perception of love. Months move on and I felt like I was at least happy enough to try again so I ask on of friends to throw me the oop, and in doing so I met this other girl named Ayana she was younger then me but by like a year, she was a very talented individual, her voice is something out of this world in my eyes. I haven’t met her in person but I’ve seen her and she seen me through photos so at least we wasn’t cat fishing each other but things went well, we was on the phone like every day talking about how our days were, you know things people usually do to get to know each other, and at that moment I really felt like I kinda found what was chasing since eighth grade even though my heart was under construction but the little man on shoulder came in from work one night, and said “bro who are you texting” and I say “a girl was talking to for awhile now”, the little man asked “what she does she look like” and I show him a photo of her and the first thing he says is drop her asap, Im looking at him crazy saying “I don’t just drop people, I'm not like those other people who do”, and as the night kept going on i fell to temptation but i wasn't going to send the text, so he took my phone and sent it anyway “saying I’m sorry I can’t date you, your to young for me”.
That was another shot to the chest but it was a double edged sword, it as two people pulling the trigger that day, me shooting her perception of love and and the old me shooting me for the realization that i lost something that i could’ve had, in other words my should of, would of, could of. Now as I sit there on my bed with the song good ones playing on repeat “But the good ones go, The good ones go, if you wait too long , But the good ones go, The good ones go, if you wait too long,So you should go, You should go, before you stay too long”. An in that moment i realize a something way to special.